learn to speak woman

Women… they will NEVER.. EVER… EVER… EVER… tell you what they want.
They are the masters of the double-talk. Every day of their lives is “opposite day”.
If you don’t believe, you are a total FOOL. Any man who have been in a longterm relationship knows this is absolute FACT.
Here is my guide to help you along, and to remind myself next time I get tricked:

1) Words Uttered: “no”
Meaning: “yes”
EXCEPTION: when it comes to sex or any sort of physical contact like kissing, hugging, etc…

2) Words Uttered: “I don’t care”
Meaning: “figure out what I want, and make it happen”
EXCEPTION: when you tell her you are sexually frustrated

3) Words Uttered: “Do whatever you want”
Meaning: “Do EXACTLY what I told you, or else you are dead meat”
EXCEPTION: when you are with her at the mall and shes ready to enter FOREVER 21.

4) Words Uttered: “You don’t have to if you don’t want to”
Meaning: “You have to. You have to. You have to. And you better WANT IT!!!”
EXCEPTION: There are no exceptions. This is always a HAVE TO.

Seriously, men of the world, this list is VERY VERY VERY VERY IMPORTANT. Memorize it and use it in your every day life if you don’t want to end up like me right now. :( Trust me, I will be referring to this list in the very near future. Good luck.