I am not a real man

He’s not a real man.

His boys can’t swim.

That’s nature way of telling them they shouldn’t reproduce.

Those are some of the exact words that I said when I heard about friends who have a hard time getting pregnant.

Right now, sitting here in my throne of humbleness and experience, those words feel like a sledge hammer to the chest, taking all the air out of my lungs.

I am writing about this because I noticed that in a lot of support forums for people dealing with infertility, there are always recurring threads from people who are sad and upset at the hurtful and insensitive things friends and family say to them.

While I empathize with the sorrow, I think that we have to forgive them. Because like me, before you have to go through with infertility yourself, it’s hard to imagine or understand how painful it is.

I guess there are good people out there who can sympathize with that pain without going through it themselves, but I bet there are more people like me who will never know what it feels like until they experience it.